Lonely Girl

Week 4

So if I see a picture of some girl wrapped around you with your hands on her bum .. should I be annoyed or am I supposed to think thats normal and okay.  Fuck my heart hurts .. why do I have to care so much! Just makes me feel so down! 

Week 3

Yeah I got jel and I flipped.  We had a huge argument and it was really sad :( wasted precious time but i wasn’t going to sit there with the girl he flirts with! I try and have faith but it hurts sometimes it really does and I think to myself I can’t just be a mug and let it slide :( 

The rest of the weekend was lovely.  I wanted to show him that it’s good spending time with me! We went on a pedalo and around the park! It was lovely.  

I need to stop feeling insecure and jealous.  He says he loves me so I shouldn’t need to worry!

Week 3

Yeah if some stupid girl just walks in your room and comments how ‘nice your bed is’ and sits with her arm on your shoulder while I sit on Skype watching/listening to it all .. Yes I’m going to be a little bit annoyed! FFS I’m sorry but that is a little bit annoying to me and I felt a little upset .. don’t be so angry with me :’(

Week 3

Had the nicest weekend with himmm :) 

Was lovely! Sad leaving on sunday night but I somehow coped well even though I don’t know when the next time will be! .. I miss him and it makes me feel sad but I try to be happy about it and I actually feel okay.  I feel so positively about us which feels wonderful.  There is a small percentage of a chance I will see him this weekend! But we shall see! …..

Week 2

This week I’ve stayed positive! We had an argument on sunday because on saturday night he stayed out to 7am and i was checking he was okay and apparently that was a problem :/ .. I told him everything I felt and he understood and apologize.  He hasn’t been as busy this week so we’ve been texting which is sooooo much better! I’m getting the train there tomorrow until Sunday  and I cannot wait! I’m a little worried because it’s going to so different but I’m trying to keep positive.  It’ll be okay!
Oh I also bought his birthday prezzie which were tickets for march.  Positive future plans :D  

Week 1

This past week has been so hard! I men I’m used to spending all my time with him.  I thought I knew everything about him and I thought I was what he wanted.  His been clubbing every night when he always hated it before.  He chooses to just not text me  because he’s ‘busy’ and fair doos I completely understand first week and that.

I’m scared he’s changing and I’m not there to keep up.  I’m trying to keep myself busy here which I can do but he’s always in the back of my mind and I get upset so easily.  

I keep telling myself it’ll be okay .. it will get better .. i’ve just got to stay strong and I’m trying so harddd I just want to know he wants to see me.  We’ve spoke about me coming to him next weekend and I’m excited but so scared as well.

I hope to god he hasn’t changed so much.  I’ve lost so many people from them changing and deciding I’m not good enough for them anymore and I have a real fear of that! :’(

The Start …

Well it’s not really the start, it’s been about a week now.

Myself and my boyfriend have gone to Uni separately and this past week has been really hard.

I decided to set this up to vent my emotions otherwise I bottle them up and they eat away inside of me until I breakdown. 

So here it goes …….